Reality Check

Hannah and I sat on the porch this evening and talked about what we had thought it would be like when Mom came home.  Looking back we weren't prepared at all for this experience.  We knew that Mom was miserable at the nursing home but we really thought she'd be happy when she got settled back at home.  All the professionals who worked with her told us that her confusion would most likely improve when she got home, but she probably would never improve to the point where she'd been before.  I can't see a lot of improvement yet, but it hasn't even been a week.

Communication is a big problem.  Usually we can figure out what she's trying to say but not all the time.  She can speak just fine, but the words put together don't make sense.  For example, today she told me to get my pickles.  Ok, that sounded ridiculous, but I realized that she was upset because I wasn't wearing shoes.  Pickles were shoes.  And I'm sure that to her, the things we say sound just as silly.  It must be so frustrating to her.  I don't know if that's a result of the stroke or the dementia, or both.

She's not sleeping at night so that takes a toll on us and on her.  She doesn't wander so I'm not terrible concerned about that, but I'm worried that I won't hear her get up and she'll fall or get hurt somehow.  Hannah is a pretty light sleeper and she's very alert to her Grandma so she gets up a lot with her. 

I hope this doesn't sound like a complaint because it's not meant to be that.  It's just a reality check.  I love my mom and, even though I'd never choose this path for her, I'm going to walk it with her.   

Mom Is at Home

Mom came home yesterday, a day ahead of schedule.  She got so agitated on Sunday that we asked if she could come home on Monday instead of waiting until today.  She's much happier here but still very confused.  Today started out better than yesterday but I think I've just had my first experience with sundowning.  Home Health care came this afternoon and she didn't like that at all.  Since it was the first visit there was a lot of paperwork to do.  She got very upset and kept telling them to stop yakking and leave.  She slept most of the rest of the afternoon and enjoyed supper, but after supper she was very irritable and more confused than usual.  A little after 8:00 she got upset at being up so late and wanted to go to bed.  I tried to help her to bed but she said that I wasn't going to tell her what to do.  Then she really got upset and tried to make me leave. I just kept talking to her in a calm voice and agreeing with everything she said.  Eventually I got her to bed.  She felt like she couldn't breathe but I think it was more of a panic attack than anything else.  She wanted me to sit with her, so I did.  Then she wanted everything cleaned off her nightstand so I did that.  At this point she seems to have settled down.  I hope she can rest well. 

Mom's Day Today

When I got to the nursing home this morning, Mom was complaining that her stomach hurt.  This is a common complaint for her.  We fixed her some oatmeal and that seemed to help.  Then I met with the nurses to learn how to give Mom's insulin injections.  It isn't something that I'm looking forward to, but I can do it.

My niece is a nurse where Mom is at rehab, and she found her this afternoon over on a totally different hall.  She asked Mom what she was doing, and Mom said, "Looking for something to steal."  My niece said, "Grandma, what do you mean?"  Mom said, "I'm looking for something to steal so I can get kicked out of this place."  She is so ready to come home. 

Mom's Cardiologist Visit

Mom had a cardiologist visit today.  It went pretty much the way I expected.  She has some complex health issues that are hard to manage.  She has congestive heart failure, a rapid, irregular heartbeat, diabetes, blood pressure problems, dementia, and she's had a stroke.  The doctor said that giving her medication for all these conditions is like walking a tightrope.  What helps one condition can cause problems with another.  He made some medication changes and ordered blood work.

She's supposed to come home on Tuesday.  Hannah and I are going to sit in on her physical therapy session Friday to get an idea of how her mobility is.  I still need to learn how to administer her insulin.  That scares me but the nurses assure me that I can learn to do it.  She is so unhappy at the nursing home, though.  It's hard to leave her, begging us to take her home.  If all goes as planned, by next week at this time she'll be home. 

After the nursing home van picked Mom up at the doctor's office, Hannah and I went to the library.  It was a nice break.  We haven't been to the library all summer.  Now we have to remember to return our books on time.

+First Post

Months ago, my brother suggested that I start a blog so I'm following his advice.  It just took me a while. 

Today was the first day of our last year of homeschooling.  Hannah is a senior.  I've been homeschooling for more years than I can remember.   And now this is the last year.  I've loved homeschooling, mostly because I got to spend so much time with my children and they are wonderful company.  But now this season of life is ending, and that's ok.  

We're trying to settle in at Mom's house.  She is scheduled to come home from rehab next Tuesday.  It's going to be a huge adjustment for all of us.  She hasn't been home since June, and the stroke and the infections have really accelerated her dementia.  I can't envision what it's going to be like, but we're going to manage.